So last night the President addressed the country, as every President of the United States does once a year, and gave his view of where the country currently stands, where he hopes we are going, and how he believes he will help us get there.
This is not about the content of the speech – it’s about the concept of a periodic check-in. Once a year the country has a check-in to examine strengths and weaknesses, and to make plans for the year to come.
I think a marriage can benefit from regularly scheduled “State of the Union” check-ins as well. Even couples that communicate well consistently can get caught up in the day-to-day of just getting everything done, and never really stop to examine what is working, what isn’t, and what action needs to be taken to meet future goals.
Of course I don’t recommend waiting a whole year in between your State of the Unions. For some it might work best to do it once a week, setting a small amount of time each week when you can both be free from distractions and touch base regarding your marriage. Or perhaps once a month works better, maybe during a coffee date or meal out just the two of you. The important thing is to make it an unbreakable commitment. Put it on the family calendar, set up a meeting request/reminder on your Outlook, and consider it a “must do” for the two of you.
Some areas to think about might be:
-how well goals you’ve made previously are being met
-each person’s needs and desires as they fit within the marriage
-current finances and financial goals for the near and long-term future
-spirituality within your marriage
-parenting challenges, successes, and upcoming issues and events for your children
-things that you are struggling with, as individuals and as a couple, and what that means within your marriage
What else do you think couples could address in their State of the Unions?