Last night I was half asleep, half awake on the sofa – missing The Hub who returned today after some travels, cuddling Potter and trying to get up the energy to wake up enough to go to bed.
The news started and the lead story snapped my eyes open – a pregnant woman had been the victim of a hit-and-run in a family oriented master-planned area of town earlier in the evening. (link)
The woman was in critical condition and, at the time of the report, it was just becoming known that her unborn child had not survived.
I sat – clinging to the dog and my tummy and crying and praying and wondering why. Frozen in terror and sadness about how fragile and quick time on this earth really is. I didn’t really sleep after that – I just thought and prayed and stared at the Disney Channel and buried my face and hands in the dog’s fur as he slept beside me on the sofa. Also I listened to the Cub’s heartbeat with my doppler. A lot.
I admit I don’t understand. I know that God’s plan is just that – GOD’S plan, and not for us to know. In cases like this it seems almost impossible to accept. Also I can’t comprehend that someone could, #1, hit some one, and then #2, just leave. I know it is not my place to judge, and that there is a time and a place, and a Being supremely more qualified to do that than I am – but there is an anger in my heart towards that person that reaches down deep into the very depths of my soul.
I will be so thankful to set my eyes on my husband this evening when I get home, and so grateful to be safe, and so mindful to be careful (and to beg him to be, even just to humor his crazy pregnant wife.) But I don’t think my thoughts will go far from that mother clinging to life in that hospital bed, or her heart that must at least partially yearn to let go and to go to heaven to be with her baby -and her husband and family in their grief.
If you are reading this, then keep them in your prayers as I will, as you hold your loved ones near in your arms and in your hearts.